So fed up.... WITH MEN!

So, I feel like I just wasted the last 6 almost 7 months of my life. I had been dating a guy. And well Thursday he had said something about hanging out this weekend. Well, I told him that he had been acting distant lately (which he had been). And I basically told him I have felt like I have been in the friend zone a while. And he said and I quote "We are friends. I really don't want more than that with anyone right now. But you are important to me. I apologize for being distant lately." For one, why had he been leading me on for months and telling me he likes me...and then says that. For two.. be man enough that you are ALMOST 30 and just say hey right now I am not looking for anything upfront. Instead of stringing my emotions a long for months. He will email me at work and act like nothing is wrong, so I had to send him an email that said.. let me clear my head and then maybe we can be friends in the near future. I am fed up with dating. Seriously. I am 29 and I feel like I have dated a lot of "young" guys who don't know what the heck they want.

I would like my friends to set me up with guys they think I would be compatible with rather than ones that I have nothing in common with. I really want to be in a relationship that leads to marriage. I am meeting all the wrong guys. It sucks. People keep saying

You gotta kiss a lot of frogs, to find your prince.

My response is...

You live in a fantasy world and have watched too many DISNEY movies.

My heart is broken and I feel sad...

29 things I want to accomplish before my 30th birthday.

Well it's an hour into my birthday. I have been pretty negative lately. I always get a little meloncholy around my birthday cause I never feel like I really accomplish anything. I have decided that it's time to make me a better me and start doing stuff to better my life. Here are 29 serious and funny things I want to do in the next year.

1. Get back to the gym and lose weight.
2. Start eating better.
3. Learn how to budget my money better and stick to a budget.
4. Have a couple thousand saved dollars saved up in my savings account.
5. Get out and meet new people.
6. Try to start going back to church.
7. Get out and date more.
8. Go on some vacations.
9. Get a permanent position with the Federal Government.
10. Buy a flat screen tv and a blu ray player.
11. Pay down my debt.
12. Be a better friend.
13. Reconnect people from my past.
14. Be the best person I can be.
15. Be more positive.
16. Take more pictures.
17. Read more.
18. Learn to be happy with myself.
19. Live with no regrets.
20. Do more crafts.
21. Be happy with being single.
22. Get a passport and use it!
23. Visit with my grandma more.
24. Move into my own place.
25. Write poetry more often.
26. Stop and "smell the roses" everyday, find the joy in every day.
27. Learn to sew.
28. Make someone's day whenever you can.
29. Thank God everyday for something.

Let's hope that I can do this. :). Even if I don't that's okay. But.. in the next year of my life I want to try to start making something of myself.