It's been a bad day...

I probably shouldn't start writing a blog at 3:15am but I feel like I want to. I just got off work and I have a feeling if I don't blog about whatever then I am going to not sleep well. I am ticked. I didn't get the job at the IRS in their HR job. They said "you're highly qualified BUT your not being selected." I am sick of the IRS taking forever to say "no". It's pissing me off.

I dyed my hair blonde yesterday. Well my hairdresser dyed my hair blonde. IT didn't go the exact color I wanted, but I guess it works for now.

I started working 4 10's at work! I work Tuesday-Friday 4:00pm to 2:30am. I actually like having EVERY monday off. It's nice. I can do so much more with a 3 day weekend.

I fell down my stairs last week, so I have not been to the gym in 2 weeks doctor's orders. I was in a lot of pain last week, it has subsided and I plan on returning to the gym monday. They canceled the biggest loser at work because they said it's gambling! Oh well. WHatever.

I am going on a weekend trip in about 4 weeks to Southern Utah and to Vegas with a friend. Should be fun. I need to get away.

I have kind of had a crappy week. Well, actually I just am kind of sick of the way my life is going. I'd say about 95% of my friends are married. I hang out with one of my married friends all the time. And hang out with a few other friends here and there but I feel like I am starting to be a nusiance with some friends. I'm busy but I do like doing stuff ocassionally with friends. I guess I just feel down lately. I will be 28 this year. In Utah's terms I am an old maid. I don't understand why guys are such idiots now. I've dated a lot of good guys in my life but most have been duds. Everyone keeps saying "You'll find the right one" Yeah, right it's not happening. I am done with my search. Yep, you heard me. I just decided that marriage probably isn't for me and having kids probably will never be an option because my "soulmate" doesn't exist. My biggest dream in life is to be a mother and wife, but I don't understand why "he" hasn't came into my life. I know I would know when he did. I am just sick of looking. I sometimes feel like crawling underneath a rock and dying sometimes. Tonight (friday) is one of those days. Don't you love those days when you feel like a piece of crap and that your life has no meaning and you feel like nobody cares about you?! Yeah, well that's me today! Enough of my venting on things I have no control over. I think I may just stay in bed all weekend with the blanket pulled up over my head while I shut the world out. After I sleep I should be in a happier mood. We'll see. It's stupid that a job that you really wanted you didn't get and it can screw up your mood!